Let's Reflect

As we draw closer to 1,000 subscribers on YouTube, I would like to reflect on the first video I ever posted. On February 28, 2017, I posted a video titled, “How I earned over $150,000 in scholarships.” I remember being terrified. While my mom and I recorded this video, I was extremely self-conscious and overwhelmed during the entire process. I was afraid of how the video would be received. Would people make fun of me? Would I come across robotic? Do I look goofy? Was this white shirt a good idea? Should I have worn my hair curly instead of straight? Is the video quality actually trash? Will people even care?

These thoughts continued to swirl around in my head and they were vicious! Self-doubt was in full effect. I ended up recording this video twice within a two-week period and I wanted every take to be PERFECT. There were so many times where I just wanted to trash the whole video and hide in a corner somewhere. However, I knew that I needed a platform to share my story and expertise. I knew that I needed to put myself out there in order to build my brand and establish myself as a leader in this market. Despite feeling frustrated and fatigued and thinking I wasn’t good enough, I published the video anyway. After a few months, the video started gaining a lot of views. I still don’t know why or how, but I was ecstatic! I was overwhelmed by the positive feedback and overjoyed to see that people found it valuable and even inspirational. To date, this video has nearly 27,000 views and has been shared more than 60 times. One very important thing I learned through that experience is that I am - and will probably always be - my biggest critic. I must admit, I do look back on that video and cringe - just a tad. However, It’s incredible to see just how far I’ve come and how I’ve developed a level of comfort in front of the camera and with you all. I realized that when you are fully aware of the purpose behind your decisions and actions, nothing - and I do mean nothing - should disrupt your execution. Just do it, even when afraid.

With Love,

Alanna McCatty